Hello, how’ve you been? I hope you are either enjoying the beginning of summer or the winter, depending where you are in the world. For this month, I thought of sharing in a different way:
Things I’m thinking and feeling lately:
1- You are always on time for your life. This should be on a Post-It note, on our skin, on our mirrors. We should give ourselves this grace daily. So here, take it: You are always on time for your life.
2- During the summer, I swim a lot in the ocean. It has always been a way to reset, release and heal. To be completely immersed in this infinite body of water is a reminder of both my size in relation to the earth while also an assurance I’m part of it. The other day I was thinking about how I learned with the ocean, the only way to cross big waves is by diving deep.
3- The thing we are resisting to feel: grief, anger, fear, sadness…will get much greater, louder, bigger if we keep it at a distance, if we keep wishing it wasn’t here. If we keep trying to hide from it. The instant we decide to actually turn in its direction and feel it with openness and curiosity, the thing we are resisting gets smaller, less loud, and we can then begin to see what is really there, underneath.
4- Children ask for limits and boundaries. They request it in their behavior, in their body language, in their tantrums, in their eyes. Feeling okay, as parents or caregivers, with holding this boundary is a big lesson for us to model to them and ourselves. It’s an assurance that ripples inside of us and them. A message like “someone is in charge here and I’m being taken care of.”
5- It’s taken some heavy lifting to undo some of the pandemic behavior. Our worlds got smaller so quickly and we had to adapt to this new reality very fast and to move forward now, with openness and somewhat changed, has been interesting to notice. I’m finding it challenging to remember to reach out to friends and see them in person. It seems like I got used to not being around many people and to undo that requires extra attention. What has been challenging for you to return to after the pandemic?
6- Silence is important in many situations. But mostly, when someone is telling us how they are feeling. When we are not being heard in a conversation. When everyone is talking at the same time. When we need answers and guidance. And lastly, when we are experiencing a special moment and we want to soak it all in.
7- So much of our suffering is around: How to avoid this? How to fix this? How to get rid of this? How to not feel something? Life is not aseptic. We can’t reduce our lives to try and be inside a bubble that is protected from anything that isn’t good, beautiful, safe etc…This is a delusion that keeps us from living fully.
8- I said this before, but I'll repeat it again. Self awareness, inner exploration. turning inward is not the same as monitoring, scanning for what is wrong. It’s not a way to measure all the things you are doing “wrong” or poorly. It’s the opposite, it’s a way to create internal space to include all of your experiences, all the parts that make you who you are.
9- I’ve been thinking a lot about Fundamental Attribution Error, where we attribute our mistakes to the context but the ones of our partners are rooted in their faulty personality. Ester Perel talks more about it here. Especially, when we are being overly critical with partners, friends, parents or children this might be an indication we are displacing our own criticism into others.
10- I read somewhere online this little conversation and I love to remember it from time to time:
Meri, do you know how to swim?
No, but I know how to learn
(Meri, 2 years old)
11- Doing easy things on hard days has been a mantra over here.
With love,
Mariana
TO READ, LISTEN, WATCH & REFLECT:
1- New playlist (this is a long & personal one that I’ve been listening 24/7) + meditation recordings
2- This will change the way you think about ambition
3- Kierkegaard on the two main ways people lose their true selves
4- The neuroscience of loving music
5- Maya Angelou on courage
6- My path back to my family’s language. A beautiful essay that brought me to tears.
7- Talking about language, home, culture… Please go watch Past Lives. What a breathtaking film!
8- Meaning beyond words, an article about the power of poetry
9- How my father and I drew a new life. Ufff!
FREE MONTHLY GATHERING: GUIDED MEDITATION + BREATHING PRACTICE
This is a virtual circle and as always everyone is invited, meditation experience and talking/sharing is NOT required.
NEXT GATHERING
July 28th
9 am (pacific time) / 12 pm (easter time)/ 5 pm (London Time)
On Zoom
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Additional Offerings
Mentorship for New Teachers : One-on-One Mentoring Sessions to Beginner or New Teachers or people who wants additional training
Corporate Programs : Contemplative Program for Companies
Private Sessions: One-on-One Contemplative Psychotherapy Program
A little about the private sessions
My work is dynamic, present and unique to individual needs. Together, we will create the conditions for a safe and connected space that makes expansive self-exploration possible. Together we’ll find stillness and awareness to help meet yourself where you are and with inquiry and acceptance begin a process of self-compassion and integration, through a combination of the following:
Meditation instructions and coaching for both beginner and more experienced meditators
Body awareness practices and visualizations for a more embodied and somatic experience
Support in becoming more aware of and breaking free from negative patterns
Guidance to integrate techniques of both formal and informal practices into daily life
Practical tools to process difficult emotions, self-criticism, negativity and grief
Moments of dialogues, inquiries and processing
Nothing Twice
Nothing can ever happen twice.
In consequence, the sorry fact is
that we arrive here improvised
and leave without the chance to practice.
Even if there is no one dumber,
if you're the planet's biggest dunce,
you can't repeat the class in summer:
this course is only offered once.
No day copies yesterday,
no two nights will teach what bliss is
in precisely the same way,
with precisely the same kisses.
One day, perhaps some idle tongue
mentions your name by accident:
I feel as if a rose were flung
into the room, all hue and scent.
The next day, though you're here with me,
I can't help looking at the clock:
A rose? A rose? What could that be?
Is it a flower or a rock?
Why do we treat the fleeting day
with so much needless fear and sorrow?
It's in its nature not to stay:
Today is always gone tomorrow.
With smiles and kisses, we prefer
to seek accord beneath our star,
although we're different (we concur)
just as two drops of water are.